Why I don't have a blog yet

 Captain's Blog Stardate 20120314.0251

Instead of telling you why I have a blog, I'll tell you why it's taken me so long to finally have one...

I am one of those people who worries too much about what others think. Most times, I bring this upon myself. I am the one who posts stupid things on Facebook. I'm the one who is always saying things that are, quite frankly, corny. Most people probably think I am not the knife in the drawer. In reality, I have always been very intelligent. I took it upon myself to "dumb myself down". Why would someone do that?? It's not normal.

When you spend your life unsure of yourself, for whatever reason, you tend to do things that are unorthodox. I act this way, to ensure that people like me. I have been this way, so people can be comfortable with themselves around me. It has worked, to an extent. It does tend to classify you in a manner that doesn't reflect who you are.

Does it matter? In my mind it has. It has brought about an equal, but opposite problem. Now I am in a world where you need to be smart. You have to be quick. I am currently in the process of reinventing myself. It's hard to do, when you've spent most of your life being a lovable dolt.

So... Why don't I have a blog yet??

I have a lot to say, more than what can be put in a Facebook status. I think I worry that people will pick it apart. I worry that my words will be misunderstood, or not translate well into text. People who know me, know that I use character voices, pop culture references, and twisted song lyrics to get my point across, most times heavy on the comedy. I think sometime down the way, I'd like to make a video blog, so people will understand more of the things I say. But for now, I'll work on getting this off the ground.

I worry that my writing skills are lacking. I study myself, and I feel I have a problem with keeping focus, and with keeping intensity throughout the project. I tend to ramble, and I am, right now, thinking of the next subject, while I'm typing this.

My wife seems to think I have A.D.D., and I think I would agree with her, but... We're not doctors. My brain works like a Robin Williams stand-up act. It gets kind of hard sometimes. My wife (We'll call her Jackie... since that's her first name) thinks medication would help. I say, no. I need to be able to cover all the angles, before they come up, if I'm ever going to take over the world. Medication would dull my extreme intelligence.

I think I worry that no one cares to hear what I have to say. I'm not anything special, but neither is anyone else. I sometimes think that my life is nothing worth writing about.

I'm a procrastinator. I am just being lazy. I watch the right opportunity pass by, and my brain paralyzes my body into doing nothing but worrying about failing. It's crazy that I've accomplished anything so far.

I could write a book on procrastination. Maybe I'll start tomorrow...

So... Why don't you have a blog???

I do... You just read it.